"While chronic sorrow is conceptualized as being normal and understandable, there are no formal and customary social supports and expectations, rituals or recognitions of the catastrophic loss, since the person who is the source of the loss continues to live." (Chronic Sorrow, Roos) This sentence from my last post on "remembering" echoed in my consciousness. There are no rituals for chronic sorrow...no baptisms, no funerals, no goodbyes, no parties...Nothing to help the healing and thus sorrow gains the status of "chronic". That is, unless you create a ritual...personal to each situation. The following is a brief excerpt from Sharon's book "Ceramic to Clay" which describes our ritual and shares pictures from the ceremony. The event occurred in the Summer of 2001, three years after the accident.
|We began by offering tobacco and honey to the river;|
to demonstrate that we knew the river meant no harm!
And so, ceremony is created for healing chronic sorrow...and must be re-created over again (still working on this). To conclude with the amazing...after trying for several years to sell our house in Greenfield, we learned upon re-visiting the site of the river and the ceremony on the 9th anniversary date of accident, that the house sold. Our broker called us on the afternoon of July 24, 2007...at the river with the news. So, the Universe does care for its own.