Adam Dzialo

Adam Dzialo
Our son, Adam Dzialo, age 30

Friday, November 9, 2012

A Dad's Wedding Speech....

    November 3, 2012

     For those of you who don’t know me I’m Phil,  Aimee’s Dad and on behalf of my wife Sharon and I, I would like to welcome you all here today to celebrate the marriage of our daughter Aimee  to Tony.
     I would like to welcome Tony’s parents, Steve and Donna, his brothers and grandmother, as well as all of our relatives and friends. I know a lot of you have traveled considerable distances to be here.
     Many of you have my met my son, Adam, who was severely disabled in a near drowning at a summer camp over 14 years ago.   A special woman in Adam’s life who had the uncanny ability to decipher his thoughts, once told us:  Adam says  “Love means showing up and being there, even when you don’t have to….”  It is with his sentiment that I welcome you.
   Thank you all for coming, it’s very much appreciated.

     As father of the bride I have the pleasure of making the only long speech on this magical day…
     I have given much thought about what to say or not to say. For those who know me, I speak my mind, my truth and really don’t censor much.  I often can’t complete a sentence without a profanity thrown in for effect.  But, I promised that I would be behave this evening.
However, for myself, it is has been over 31 of marriage years since I was allowed to say anything without being disagreed with, laughed at or ignored, so this is too good an opportunity to miss.
At the end of the day, it is my speech and I can say what I like.

This is the point where I am supposed to say a few embarrassing things about Aimee when she was younger but unfortunately she has been a perfect daughter. I do know, however, that over the course of the evening, after a few drinks, Aimee’s friends will share more than you want to know.  I am also anxious to hear about those moments from my princess’s life which have been hidden from me with care.
Suffice it to say that Sharon and I are both very proud of how she much she has accomplished and how she has grown up and we are both delighted that she has found someone who she obviously loves and cares for very much.
Aimee is our first child and I can attest to the fact that it was a long and memorable birth…with emphasis on very, very long…
When we spent months in ICU with Adam  in 1998, an elderly and crippled physician pulled Sharon and I aside.  And, as if he could foretell the future, he simply said…”Remember, always, that you have two children…”
We never forgot those words, and I guess that’s how Aimee became a princess.  Despite whatever difficulty we faced, Aimee was always given the best … she was our daughter and our love.  Aimee has made us very proud. All parents want their children to have a good education and give themselves a good start in life.  Aimee accomplished that and we’ll be paying for quite a while.  Today, I look at my daughter and I see an independent, attractive, elegant, stunning young woman. She obviously takes after her mother.
Of course she inherits other traits from me…

·       her cooking…
·       her like of one or two small drinks…
·       her ability to induce others to clean up her messes…
·       her obsessive compulsive need to control…
·       her allergy to people’s bullshit…she, like dad, both have built in detectors and reject that which is false and pretentious
·       her appreciation for the finer things in life (though we disagree about the meaning of finer)
    She learned compassion, sympathy and a zest for living from her brother. She has learned about unconditional and unwavering love from her mother.  She gets her intelligence and drive from both mom and dad…that is the politically right thing to say!
    And, she has well learned about the intricacies of politics from her love, Tony!  Thank god, we’re all on the same page!!!  (four more years!!)

     Every Father hopes his daughter will find an accomplished, sensible, loving and compassionate  partner and as much as you try not to interfere in their lives, you always hope your children will make the right choices in life.  Aimee, thanks to the power and intention of universal energy, chose Tony.
   I have found that Tony is compassionate, sensitive, loving, intelligent and one hell of a singer.  I am so impressed by Tony’s ability to engage Adam…this a trait and quality of humanity that I rarely encounter in many people.  It is for those and many other reasons, that I welcome you and your family into ours.
     Tony, I hope that you will be able to keep my daughter in the lifestyle to which she has become accustomed and desires.   I’m not sure that either of us knows or understands the depths of princess-hood. To help you with your marriage, I thought I would give you some advice based on my 31 year experience of married life.
    Marriage will teach you many things… loyalty…self restraint…obedience…I am still in daily training on these matters.
     There is no challenge in a marriage that can’t be overcome by one or more of the following:
·       I was wrong!
·       You were right!
·       Yes Dear
·       I love you!
     Finally, never go to bed in the middle of an argument – be a man, stay up and fight and watch some sports or play Angry Birds. You’ve lost anyway, so you might as well get it over with.
    I would just like to leave you with this thought…
     The actor Richard Burton once said that ‘a woman accepts a man for what he is and then spends the rest of her life trying to change him.’… So, if we can all take one last look at Tony as we know him because Aimee’s remodeling work starts first thing in the morning.
Finally, this day is magic.  I believe in magic.  I see magic in their eyes, in their touch, in their embrace …they are magic unfolding in front of us.  It’s the way things should be!  It’s the way things are meant to be…magic!


  1. What a wonderful speech from a father to his daughter (princess).

  2. What a brilliant speech. I bet Aimee was proud of you too:)

    One of my favorite lines was her allergy to bullshit! I'm going to put that on my next health form allergy section!!

    So glad that you all had a brilliant day xxx sent you all Mel
    Hugs from afar xxx



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