Adam Dzialo

Adam Dzialo
Our son, Adam Dzialo, age 30

Thursday, August 18, 2011

"I'm Uncomfortable Around Disabled People..."

     Comments abound when people are questioned as to why Adam is not in the their lives?  Frequently, I hear, "I'm not comfortable....."
     We all have disabilities but some disabilities are not obvious to casual observers.
      We do not avoid you because of your more subtle disabilities.  I become very angry when people avoid my son because of their personal discomfort!  This response eats at my core and brings out an atomic response.

Adam at his Last ABR Evaluation

        Fuck you and get over it!! Get over your discomfort, now!  It's not my job to make you comfortable; it's not my job to make my kid visually appealing to you; it's not my job to make my kid walk and talk like you...It's not my job to blow sunshine up your ass!  Simply, love him as a child of the universe, perfect in all ways important or run and hide in your cave of delusion about how things should be!  Consider him as important as you consider yourself and relate to him out of a belief in the perfection of all humanity.  If you can't; stay far, far away!  Your energy can destroy our harmony and equanimity.

       The internet and blogging world is just a modern day incarnation of a huge smudge stick...smudging (see previous post) will release subtle negative energy to dissipate.  Releasing your anger and rage through cyberspace will dissipate it and release its bonds which bind you.  Releasing is freeing...releasing will make it stick to whatever object it chooses, not you nor your kid nor your home.

        Send your ills into the black hole of cyberspace.


  1. "its not my job to blow sunshine up your ass™". Wasn't that trade marked by Claire?

  2. Certainly, must arise from a similar experience with some realities...actually comes from the movie Top Gun (1986)...ages me, no!

  3. Yes, yes ,yes, - I'm feeling empowered. Thanks Phil - i' m sick of apologizing!

  4. I'm getting there too...when you have children without a voice who you know feel things and energies around them very deeply, you become their voice. Blessings....

  5. Phil,
    I totally get where you are coming from. I finally put beautiful daughter's blog on my blog roll under kindred spirits with yours and Sharon's. Her post today made me cry, but we talked about it before she posted and I gave her permission to post it. It is important to release those negative emotions sometimes as long as we remember to really let them go and not bring them back into our house. Adam is obviously doing better from the pictures and anyone who knows anything about brain injuries has to be able to see what an excellent job you and Sharon do of taking care of him.

    Anger is certainly appropriate at times as long you express it here instead of punching the person who makes such insensitive comments. I am also glad to see that you are not bullying them to try to get them to change because that would not be real change anyway. Sending, you and your entire family love and hugs my friend.

  6. Thanks. Sue, for your comments...your comments really lit up our day. Although we do about 3 to 5 hours a day of therapy with Adam, it's often hard to see the changes to his structure on a daily basis. It is so heartening to hear from someone who is in the field that he looks well for the experience he has undergone. We don't get that feedback often, so it's really a gift.
    Sending the negative vibrations into cyberspace did really release enables one to get back back to work without a cloud. I have learned that although people can change, we really can change them unless they want to and that that desire comes from their core.. So you learn to let go, and it's ok.
    Again, thanks for your gracious words and observations...blessings to you and your family.

  7. It is not my first time to go to see this web page, i am visiting this website dailly and obtain pleasant facts from here daily.
    My homepage - panic attack

  8. 私は使用してあなたの現在のDSL接続は、私は持っていたの年と動作偉大な。洗練された豪華な卓越したクラフトマンシップと疑う余地のない効果は、要素、Haemmer株式会社。

    Take a look at my blog post: レディース ブランド 時計


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...